Tuesday, January 12, 2016

What NOT To Say To A Pregnant Woman

wearing: striped top - Motherhood Maternity, cardigan - Banana Republic, jeans - Thyme Maternity,
 purse - Rebecca Minkoff Mini Mac c/o Shopbop, boots - Steve Madden (old), toque - Bench Canada
Side note: As a personal stylist, I'm totally aware of the fact that some type of stripes can make you look wider than you actually are but my stomach's so big at this point that it doesn't really matter anymore lol.

So I've been chuckling over some of the comments made to me while I'm currently growing a baby in my belly and I thought I'd share some of them with you ; ) If you're unsure of what to say around a woman "with child," read below for what NOT to say.

"You have a really good appetite don't you? I can tell!" while nodding repeatedly as the pregnant woman is eating tortilla chips and salsa, quite elegantly I might add, not at all like a little piggy. (This was said to me in front of a group of people.)

"Are you scared to give birth? I'm scared FOR you. I heard it feels like you're being ripped in half!" Gee, thanks! As if the thought of trying to push a bowling ball through a straw hasn't terrified me enough!

"You're STILL eating??" with eyes wide open. Yes, I'm still eating. I AM growing a human inside of me, I'm hungry as hell, this baby is literally sucking the energy and nutrition out of me and I need a wee bit extra calories thank you very much. Also, I'll barf if my stomach isn't full. If I want to have two lunches and/or send my husband to Dairy Queen at 10 at night, I WILL!

"You're going to breastfeed, right?? You really should." as if there is only one, correct answer to this question. It isn't anyone's business and no one should be judged if they decide not to. I'm not saying I won't breastfeed I'm just saying that it's ok if it doesn't happen with baby, whether it's the mom's personal choice or if they can't produce enough milk. Let's all just support one another as soon-to-be/new moms and not judge!

"How much weight have you gained? It will be so hard to lose it after!" with a tilt of the head and a sorry look on your face, as the mom-to-be is about to reach for that second donut.

"Was this pregnancy planned?" Asking as if this is a perfectly normal question and not invasive AT ALL. Plus, I don't even KNOW you!

"You DON'T have a doula/midwife?!" while giving said pregnant woman a look as if they have schmutz on their face, acting like their baby is destined to become a serial killer since it will be born in a noisy hospital (!!) with a doctor instead of in a relaxing bathtub at home with candles lit and Mozart playing in the background. (I have nothing against doulas or midwives by the way and I love classical music!)

"Make room! MAKE! ROOOOOOM!" while walking by pregnant lady in a narrow hallway, pushing yourself up against the wall, arms out wide.

All of these things have been said to me over the past 7 and a half months and I just have to laugh. These comments didn't make me angry even though maybe that's the tone that's coming across in this post, but that's not my intention, I know these people meant no harm! I was more amused that sometimes people don't think before they talk ; ) I have a healthy miracle growing inside of me and that's all that matters, I am so grateful for that so I can definitely handle people's comments! If you want to add to my list, please feel free to below because I'm very curious if others have had the same experience as me while pregnant.

Hope you're all having a great week so far!



Courtney Erin said...

Ugh, don't even get me started on the whole breastfeeding and doula self-righteousness. Not that I disagree or object to doulas or midwives or breastfeeding and would not be opposed to doing/having those things myself - but the pressure and self-righteousness is ridiculous and un-feminist. In my opinion....

Courtney ~ Sartorial Sidelines

Kassey K said...

The joys of people and their absence of filters :) One I've heard repeatedly during this pregnancy, and one that genuinely makes me laugh: "you sure there's just one in there?" Ummmm, yup, that's been confirmed for some time now!

Closet Fashionista said...

Haha, luckily I am not guilty of any of these ;)
You look great in these stripes! Such a cozy look

Marie a la Mode said...

Oh brother! "Yes I'm sure!!" You're the one carrying the baby so you would know! People!

Marie a la Mode said...

Yes it's the self-righteousness that bothers me, too.

Marie a la Mode said...

Thank you Megan! xoxo

Unknown said...

LOL! I wonder what it is about pregnancy that makes people lose all sense of the appropriate and feel the need to stop and comment on a total stranger's body?! My favorite was "Your pregnant"! I always wanted to respond "OMG! Is that what's going on?". Oh well I got a good chuckle or two! Enjoy the ride!

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