My Health Journey

I know I usually talk about fashion and beauty on this blog but today I want to talk about my health journey, which has become very important to me and the main focus in my life right now. I have never talked about this on my blog before and I feel a bit vulnerable putting it out there but I want to be honest and open with you guys, my lovely readers, and maybe something I write in this post will resonate with one of you and help you on your journey.

Growing up as a dancer, I had the perfect ballet body. I was long, lean, strong and tall and could eat two quarter pounders, fries and a coke at McDonald's (which I did often) and not gain a pound because I was constantly burning calories. I took dance classes 5 times a week and I loved dancing - it was my life- until the tendonitis in my knees forced me to cut down. When I stopped dancing as much, I gained about 10 lbs. and for the first time ever I had to watch what I ate. I cut out all red meat and lost some of the weight by exercising and non-healthy dieting. But a year later, after a very painful breakup with my high school sweetheart (and entering my first year of college), I could not stop binge eating. Clearly, I was eating my feelings. I was out of control. (For those of you wondering, I did not purge after I would binge, thankfully.) I ended up gaining 25 pounds in a very short period of time and hated how I looked. Especially since I was in theater school at the time and was constantly surrounded by mirrors in dance class and rehearsals, plus I had to wear skimpy costumes for some of our productions. So I decided I had to stop the binge eating and focus on getting skinny again!! (I should have been focusing on self-love but that would come much later.) So I started dieting and the weight started to come off.  I also started doing Pilates, which I really enjoyed. I enjoyed it so much I later got my Mat Certification, and I still teach today, along with teaching Barre classes. I should mention here that I did not eat healthy at all while on this diet though. I basically would eat food with the lowest amount of calories and fat possible, devoid of any real nutritional value, just so I could eat more throughout the day. I didn't eat enough food either, I was always hungry (and cranky) when I went to bed. Over the course of a year and a half I lost around 35 lbs. I was way too skinny but I was obsessed with my weight and food. It was horrible. I couldn't enjoy life because I was too busy focusing on how many calories or fat grams were in everything I put in my mouth and staying thin. It was my way of staying in control during a time in my life where I felt very out of control.  With some guidance and help, I eventually put on a bit of weight that I was comfortable with and started to relax about food but it was really hard.

 Just in case you wanted to know where your gallbladder was located ; )

I am pretty sure the extreme dieting and rapid weight gain and weight loss had something to do with me getting gallstones at 18 years of age. Except I didn't know they were gallstones until I was 26!! I thought they were just "cramps!" Finally my doctor ordered an ultrasound and yup, I had a ton of large gallstones that were causing me intense, curl-up-in-a-ball pain for years! So I had surgery and got my gallbladder removed. (I also contracted a nasty staph infection which was just awesome!) Anyways, shortly after my surgery I decided to become a Vegetarian (for various reasons) and thought I was eating really healthy! Wrong. I was anemic and was put on an iron supplement by my doctor. And I was still having intense pain and bloating in my stomach, among other stomach problems I'll spare you with. I thought removing my gallbladder would have helped that? When I went back to my doctor she told me I should probably get a colonoscopy (FUN!) and get tested for Celiac disease. When both tests came back negative, I was diagnosed with Irritable Bowel Sydrome. (Even more fun!!) She signed me up to see a dietician. Before seeing this dietician I had to journal what I ate for 3 weeks and when I showed her what I had written down she basically told me that if I keep eating the way I was eating I would be very malnourished and more susceptible to illness and disease. She asked if I would consider cutting out dairy and gluten. No way. I wasn't ready then. I already didn't eat meat, if I had to cut out dairy and gluten what the heck would I eat? Grass? So my dietician gave me a list of foods I should try adding to my diet, to help with my IBS as well as give me enough iron and protein to help with my anemia. I felt a bit better adding more nutritious foods to my diet but I was still feeling tired and every now and then I would get that intense pain in my stomach and it would blow up as if I was 4 months pregnant.

It wasn't until I met and started spending time with and really listening to my good friend Lisa, who writes Life By Leese when she moved back to Edmonton from New York City that I realized what you eat can actually make a difference in how you feel. I mean I guess I knew that all along but I was too lazy to make the necessary changes to live it. (Lisa gave a really good interview here to Keltie Colleen, which really inspired me, you should read it!) She is studying to be a holistic health counselor and is so passionate about healing through nutrition, health and wellness and living a healthy, fulfilling life that her positivity rubbed off on me and I asked her what I should do to help my IBS and another chronic illness I've been suffering with since I was a child (that's a whole other post!) and like the dietician I saw, she recommended cutting out all dairy and gluten. Dammit, I love my toast and I love my Dairy Queen Blizzards! But she just asked me to try it for 2 or 3 weeks. So a few days ago Lisa was kind enough to take me shopping to Planet Organic and Save-On Foods where I picked up a few staples to start with, including the items above. (The rest is in my refrigerator.) She also gave me recipe ideas, tips on juicing (which I have been doing for the past couple of months already) and ultra-healthy smoothie-making. I am slowly cutting out dairy and gluten from my diet and I'm not going to lie, it has been really hard so far. I have to consciously make healthier choices. But Lisa told me, "Don't focus on what you're cutting out, don't focus on what you can't have. Focus on all the great foods you can have and all the new, delicious foods you'll be adding to your diet and how they will make you feel." I know being Vegan and gluten-free will be hard at first but I'm willing to try. So that's where I'm at right now with my diet. I hope to be completely dairy and gluten-free by the end of this weekend, I'm just slowly weaning myself off. Right now, I'm feeling really good, with more energy than I've had in a long time. And I'm not counting calories or fat grams at all!

My very simple and favorite juice recipe: 

2 apples, 2 carrots, 1/2 cucumber, 2 celery stalks, a bunch of kale and a bunch of dandelion greens
(sometimes I will add a pear or lemon and a knob of ginger for extra taste)

In the past couple of months I have also started to amp up my workout routine, exercising 4 times a week instead of 2 or 3. I've been active all my life but I stopped doing a lot of cardio when I stopped dancing, I would just do Pilates or Yoga. I know how important cardio is for your heart, health and well-being so I've started walking when it's nice outside and also doing Tracy Anderson's DVD's. Her Metamorphosis package includes a 30 minute dance cardio section (along with a muscular structure section which is SO hard but you really see results!!) where she basically happily flails around and you have to follow her moves. I found it hard to keep up with her and the music really repetitive so I press play but do my own moves and choreography while listening to my iPod and basically dance around my living room like a boss for half an hour. Sometimes I look at the TV and follow her moves for a minute but then I get back into my own groove. When Tracy stops, I stop. It's a great workout! I do it twice a week, even though she says you should do it 6 times a week for 90 days to "transform" your body. But I get bored easily so on the other two days, I'll go to the Pilates studio and work out on the machines or go to a barre class, or do Ballet Beautiful or Barre 3 at home. I also teach 3 classes of Barre and Pilates a week now.

At the end of the day, for me it's not about just looking good, it's about feeling good, physically and mentally.  Because if you don't have a healthy mind and body, what do you have? And I finally realized this only recently! And only recently have I started to love my body. I wish it hadn't taken me this long but I'm glad I am now finally on the right track : ).

 

Thank you for listening : ). Have a wonderful weekend!